Happy Veterans Day

    Today is Veteran's Day. I would like to thank All those that have served. You have sacrificed so much. I know how hard it is to leave your family and friends to do your duty. You has spent long hard hours in places that few people even know the names or locations. We have cried, ranted and laughed at things sane people would have walked away from. Each of you are a hero in your own right. Remember, You are the few that dare to do do the things so that the many may sleep well at night.


    We must also thank our families and friends at this time. They spend long sleepless nights worrying about us each time we go down range. They are our heroes. Our spouses, families and friends must keep life going while we struggle elsewhere. It is no easy feat for them as well. They must care for our children, and keep our memories alive at the same time. Anyone that has to care for multiple children alone deserves our respect. There is a different stress involved in dealing with naked children running through the house, while trying to complete homework and cook dinner. Sanity is a fleeting thing for them.

    For those individuals and politicians that are jumping on the 'Thank a Veteran' bandwagon because it is a holiday, I am letting you know I think you are number one. However, I am not holding up my index finger. You are the people that only do this because it is fashionable to be seen doing this today. How many of you wrote a military person while they were over seas? How many of you visited a family of a veteran while they were overseas? I'd say you are the same people that couldn't find a VA hospital, let alone take the time to visit a veteran there.

    Most of Congress couldn't even tell you how many people from their home states are serving in foreign countries today. I'm certain they do not know the names. Here's an idea. Use some that Congressional money you have for expenses and send each of them a thank you letter. It could be a form letter, we understand that. Just take the time to sign it yourself. I'm sure a few hours away from the lobbyists and power brokers won't kill your career. You might even put a smile on a lone troop's face.

    There are those of you that constantly show support for the troops. For all of you, we say thank you back. The letters, boxes, and special things mean a great deal. I want to send a special thanks to my wife and family for being there. You are the reason I make it home. To the two little elder ladies that bought me shots in the airport on my last return home. Thank you as well. I needed that. Keep up the good work!

   Happy Veterans Day to all those that are still with us, and to those that have gone before us!

Shaken, Not Stirred

       I saw where a friend posted that we are the result of the thousands that came before, or some sentiment of that nature. At first, I took it to mean that we were the biological results of thousands of years of breeding. It might be more inbreeding for some. We all know that there are many physical traits that we inherit from our parents. There are even stronger traits that are shared by people from specific regions and cultures. I definitely agree with this idea. There is enough scientific data to support this assumption. Look at me I am proof. My perfect bald head is the results of genetic tweaking and refining.
     However, I believe that the idea read had more to do with the people that were part of our lives and how they affected us. The recent passing of my uncle helped me to realize the importance those people held in my life. I would like to thank each of them for the little part of them that they shared with me. Some individuals that would like to curse you for those darker parts. There is no way for me to share each part that everyone contributed to create a unique me. Therefore, I am only going to thank a few.
     I guess I should start with that person that gave me life, my Mother. Mom is strong and tough. She speaks her mind, sometimes not at the best moment. The truth was always important to her. I definitely have those attributes well in hand. There are professors, officers, and even former friends that will attest to my ability to relay the truth. Many of the times it was far from the popular thing to do. Hell! I've even made a few grow men cry. I think they needed that though.
     My Father taught me patients and a love for life. I'm sure many of the things my Dad did with me growing up would have landed him in jail today. He used to let me sit in his lap and steer the car while going down the road. I couldn't have been more than eight at that time. How many parents would even try that today? His stories about the Army and foreign lands, led to my joining and traveling to wild exotic places. It is doubtful I ever could have hoped to reached them on my own. I still write today because he loved to read my articles in the paper, before he died. Someday I hope to finish that book for him.
     There was my Grandpa Williams, Dewey was his first name. He was the 7th son of a 7th son. If you do not know what I am referring to there, I'll just say he could do some freaky stuff. He taught me a respect for nature and the things it took me a long time to accept. He was a quiet man that didn't speak a lot. However, you had better be listening when he did. I once broke my arm from falling out of a try. I was a screaming crying mess until he spoke to me. "You will be O.K.," was all he said. It was enough. The fear was gone. I even relaxed enough to help them splint my arm.

We the People

     

    I do try to stay away from politics when I write. I like to write about the more humorous aspects of life. If I do it right, some people may even think about the issues that are underlying in my stories. However, it is hard for me to ignore the government shutdown and the affect it is having on our nation. If it isn't something that is bothering you; you either live in another country, are wealthy, or need a cranium rectum inversion procedure.
    I have read many things about the problems that are occurring. I have talked to several people that this affects seriously. First, lets look WIC. Those of you that do not need it may not care. I do! They are not allowing any more parents to apply for it currently. Are you serious! We are denying children milk and food they need, because the people we elected cannot work together. I bet your local congressman doesn't go without his/her bottle of spirits tonight. Why should a child go to bed without a bottle of formula? Are we that messed up?
     Our enlightened leaders have also furloughed our stopped the pay for many government employees. The people who are in "non-critical" jobs have simply been sent home on unpaid leave, until a budget can be passed. Those that are in critical positions will not receive pay. Those are the individual that guard you from danger and harm. Yet, the individuals that are causing the problem; the Congress and White House still receive their pay and extras. I still believe we should stop their pay and fine them $20,000 a day per person. I bet a compromise would be reached quick then. Plus, that money could be used to reduce the deficit.
    We will not even discuss the money spent to close National Parks. I know it is so expensive to let someone hike or look at a monument dedicated to them. Our Veterans recently marched on D.C., tearing down the barriers that stopped men and women who had risked their lives from going to monuments. Men and women in wheelchairs and missing limbs, tore down that which stopped them from physically reaching their goals. Can we not tear down barriers as well as those brave few. Let us remove the barriers of difference and come to an understand. The nation must have it.
    I have been reading a lot of the writings of Thomas Jefferson lately. I think more people should. He was a man far ahead of our times, let alone his own. I wonder what he would think of our nation today. My guess is that he would weep at the government he found in power. So much of what he fought against has come to pass. Our nation is strong and proud. But, shall we allow pride and power to destroy what so many have fought and suffered to uphold. That is up to, "We the People."

 

Under Attack!

   

      There are many things in our lives that are humorous to others, but we do not find the laughter at the moment. I recently had one of those events. It occurred after I was attacked by a nest of yellow jackets while mowing the yard. I had my 2 year old riding with me on the mower at the time. Luckily, I was the target of their anger. She escaped any harm. She was more upset about not riding anymore, than the threat of the insects. Me, I was cursing from the stings across my back. Those little buggers pack a wallop!
    Their nest was close to the house, and I have 3 children. There was no choice. I had to eliminate them. So in true military fashion, I declared war on the terrorist insects. Their cowardly attack was not about to go unavenged. They had dug deep into the earth by my neighbors fence. They were entrenched and ready for battle. I was certain they had a network of tunnels for use to evade and attack. The typical wasp and hornet spray would not work on this foe. More elaborate and destructive measures would be required. After all, they outnumbered me 500 to one. Superior firepower was required.
I didn't have access to some good old-fashioned napalm. Even if I had some C-4, I am certain the detonation would have caused me more trouble than the solution. My wife and neighbors would have been upset with their windows being blown out. I'm sure the local police, ATF, and FBI probably would not be too happy with me either. It would not be fun to spend time in prison over some yellow jackets. A part of me would have loved to see them evaporated, despite the consequences.
     Reluctantly, I chose a few less destructive methods. Although, the choices I made weren't the least destructive choices. Like any good soldier attacking a larger force, I waited for the sun to start to set. The enemy was starting to settle in for the night. There is no better time to attack a hive than then. The little savages are starting to settle in for a good sleep. Slowly, I filled every opening I could find with gasoline. I emptied nearly 5 gallons worth in as many holes. Then, I tossed a match to it. There was no resounding explosion, but a big section of my yard went up in flames. UUGGH UUGGH fire good!!
     Once the flames died down, I began to dig up the hive. You have to make sure you get the queen. Otherwise, they will be back with a vengeance. I dug up a hole as big as the hood of my truck. The comb I found was as big as my head. I stomped and smashed it to a pulp. This is where the humor part comes in. Yellow jackets do come out, even if it is getting dark. They were not happy with my actions. I was out of accelerant, so I decided to try and drown the creatures. In a matter of minutes, I had created a miniature swimming pool. I shoved the hose down every opening I saw them crawling out of.
     A person would have thought fire and water would have ended their existence. No! They were swarming around the hole again the next morning. Resolved to finish this, I purchased 5 more gallons of gas. I didn't wait for dark. Girded in every piece of military gear I could find. The gear was thick enough to keep the stings away. I filled even more holes with gas and lit it. This time I didn't wait for the flames to die down. I began to dig up more tunnels and holes while the flames killed each of the enemy as they tried to escape. Believe it or not, there were still some of them flying around after that.

I've Fallen

   

    There are times that I feel like a kid. Then, reality will rear its ugly head. Realizing that you are not as young and resilient as you once were, is just one of the problems a person must face. I've ignored those little signs in the past. There was a time where nothing bothered me, physically. Now, things hurt a little more than they use to. Unfortunately, I had a crash course on that problem this past weekend. I was going down the steps to our bedroom. My foot slid out from under me and I landed flat on my back. That would have been bad enough, but I was at the top of the steps. I slid all the way to the bottom, my head bouncing off each step. I'm certain my head smacked 13 times. My children consider sliding down the steps an enjoyable sport. I have to continuously yell at them for playing on the stairs. They slide down on their bellies and backs, laughing manically. My feelings are definitely different.
    There I was lying at the foot of the stairs trying to catch my breath, and take inventory. Anyone that has taken a hard fall has done the same thing. Ive dealt with enough serious injuries in my day. There was no way I was moving, until I was certain there were no bones broken, or that my neck wasn't at a weird angle. Several minutes passed before I allowed myself to relax. The hour was late. Thankfully the rest of the family was sound asleep. None of my family was there to see me sprawled out like a Crash Test Dummy. The cat was there starring at me from the book shelf. Can cats snicker and grin? I would have sworn ours did.
    Certain I was in the right number of pieces, extra parts would have meant a big problem, I slowly got up. I used the wall and chair to do it. I'm certain I grunted, groaned, and cursed my way to the bedroom. There were no children about; it was okay for me to do it. The injuries weren't bad, sorry lieutenants. I am still tougher than that. But, it did make me think. There have been times when I took far worse tumbles, from greater distances, and higher velocity. Granted, some of them involved the heavy consumption of alcohol. Others, they just involved the stupidity of youth. Each episode seemed to result in minor scrapes and bruises.
    My muscles were tightening as I lay in bed contemplating my situation. My mind wandered through all the bad things that my body had been subject to. There seemed to be an endless number of things. Around nine, I wanted to be a stuntman. Endless hours were spent wrecking my bike, jumping out of the barn onto hay bales, with other tumbles and falls. That dream only lasted a summer, but I put my young body through the ringer. Band-aids and hot baths fixed it all then. I'm sure my body will feel the effects later in life. A cane will probably be the results. I wonder if I can get one that looks like a light saber, or a giant thigh bone?

Are You a Good Samaritan?

     Today was not one of those days when I felt like a knight and protector to my wife and children. Instead I was the court jester. The fool to some of you. Yea I think the fool was more of it. I was taking the children to church this morning by myself. My wife had homework and a paper that had to be finished. A quick stop by the ATM for cash to get gas and the offering. Then, we are on the way. At least, I thought we were. I should have listened to my gut, but I didn't. I ran out of gas.
    It has been a long time since that happened to me. It definitely never happened to me on a busy street, in the middle of the day. There weren't three upset children in the vehicle when I did before. I had to call my wife and have her bring the gas can for me. She quickly raced to the rescue. She brought a full gas can, allowing me to take the children to church before they revolted. Supermom saved the day. Luckily, this allowed us to make it on time. Not much of a story. However, there is more to it.
     Today gave me a new perspective on the kindness of my fellow man. I know the road was busy and people were rushing to services at various churches in the area. Cars and trucks sped by us, even with my truck blocking one full lane of traffic. I can understand someone not wanting to stop for me. I can be a little scary looking at times. I thought three little girls hanging out the windows might change someone's mind. Most people drove past giving us nasty looks, like I had done it on purpose. Yea folks, that is my idea of a good time. I try to plan ways to break down and cause issues for the masses. I threw in three upset girls for effect.
    My faith was restored by a few individuals that stopped. There were not the people you would expect, but maybe they were. Most of the people who stopped where not the well off people that could afford it. There were several elderly couples. They offered to take me to get some gas. I thanked them for the offers but pointed out the fact I had three girls sitting there crying about being late for services. Each wished me luck, one even offered to go get drinks for the girls. I declined. Children trapped in truck was bad enough. Them filled with water or juice, that was a disaster waiting to explode.
The second type of individuals to stop were even more surprising. These individuals looked as if they could barely afford to pay attention. They drove vehicles that looked as if they would fall apart at any moment. One of them even sounded as if it was ready to do just that. However, each of them took pity and stopped to try and help. Two ladies had a car full of children as well. They wished me luck when I told them I didn't have a gas can and that my wife was on the way.

Why Isn't It Fair?

   

    "Its not fair!" a little boy shouts as he is escorted inside by his mother to dinner. His friends stand there staring as their friend disappears into the house. They shrug theirs shoulders and get back to the game. All of them are happy it wasnt them. Yet, they know soon it will be their turn to leave. Most will simply wave goodbye and head off. The few remaining, throw a fit like the first child and storm off. If they were cartoons, you would see the steam cloud billowing above their heads.
     That phrase, "Its not fair!" is something you would think only a mad child might use. Okay, lets not forget the teenagers. Adults are always unfair to them. It isnt a phrase you expect to hear from adults. Unfortunately, too many of Americans feel that everything should happen exactly as they envision it. I am not sure, if this is due to a feeling of entitlement we have. I have heard too many people say "They owe me!" Who is the, "They?" Why would they owe a young nineteen or twenty-year old something? They havent been around long enough to accrue much of a debt owed them. Did their parents double-down and pass the winning credit on to them?
     I have known young men and women that have lost limbs in the service. You would be surprised at how many of them feel guilty they didnt do all they could. They feel they let their comrades and the country down because they didnt finish their tour. These individuals could lie around whining, waiting for someone to care for them. Instead, they do their therapy and try to return to their old lives. Many of them excelling at jobs, despite challenges.
     That is why it burns me up when a healthy person cries "Thats Not Fair." Usually, it is due to some fault of their own. I hear it all the time when a customer is charged a late fee for not making a payment on time. It amazes me the reasons that they come up with. I have heard everything from "I was on vacation for 2 months traveling through Europe." Sorry! Another favorite is "My Dog ate my Ipad." Seriously, are we back in high school? Folks take some responsibility for what you do. Admit you forgot and accept the consequences of your actions.
     The words are used by people when they envy what someone else has, or has achieved. "Thats not fair they have that." You know my friend, get off your backside and get to work. You can earn a lot more, if you actually go to work. I have seen so many people that want simple jobs that pay, minimum wage, just because they have no responsibility. Yet, these are the same people that want a new car, fancy home, and all the latest gadgets. My wife and I both have full time jobs, and I am in the National Guard. We cant afford all that. How can someone that spends their life attached to an Xbox expect to?
     I am far from a man that will ever own a yacht. Not that that wouldnt be nice. The choices I made in life did not take me down that path. I have no desire to be filthy rich. I would settle for comfortable. There are still choices I can make that will make life better for my family. I will not begrudge the man, driving the Porsche, his toys. I may hope his taupe flies off at an inappropriate moment. That is mainly because that would be hilarious.
     We must take responsibility for our choices and actions. Other people didnt force you to do the things you have done. No one made you spend all that money on objects you do not need, or can afford. Nor, did they force you to sit at home watching Gilligans Island instead of doing something with life. The choices were yours. Choose what is fair, for you.

He's Watching You!

    There are several times of year that I will not go near the mall, or Wal-mart. Not that I enjoy going to either of them normally. One of those times is Christmas of course. There is nothing worse than people filled with that holiday spirit of "Must Buy! Must Have!" A person takes their life into their own hands shopping then. If you do not believe me, go out on Black Friday and watch. I have seen combat zones that are friendlier.
     I talk of something almost as sinister. It is the Tax Free weekend. Im not sure how many states have this. Tennessee definitely does. This weekend is set so that parents can buy the clothes and school supplies their children need, without paying any taxes. It is a great help. Everyone with children knows how expensive getting ready for the school year can be. Any penny you can save can be spent later. Especially, when they bring home the fund raisers. You have to buy that case of candy bars that they have to sell for school. Yours may be selling cookies, or wrapping paper.
     The sale, unfortunately, only lasts for one weekend. You can imagine the pandemonium that unleashes. My wife has told me horror stories about it. This is from a woman that has braved the midnight sales at Best Buy and other major locations. She made an excellent decision to do the shopping early this year. We took the children shopping several weeks prior to the sale. There had to be a lot less stress. I can only imagine trying to keep up with three children in that chaos. I'm usually gone with the military, have to clean the gutters, mow the lawn, or anything else that keeps me away from shopping.
     I am probably like most husbands. We have a great fear of the ferocious beasts that roam the floors of sales. They are the dreaded Matriarcus Severus. This creature has the ability to take a persons arm off at the elbow with 1 bite. Especially if it is reaching into a sale bin. Don't you dare reach for that last pair of size two sparkly sketchers. There may be more than one waiting to pounce open the prize. I would rather be caught in an ambush than deal with that tenacity.
      My twisted mind can see some mothers planning their attack strategy for weeks, prior to the sale. They have their primary and secondary routes prepared, along with the quickest exit routes. This is the type of person I see speeding through the parking lot in a supped up minivan. She does a power slide into a parking space, cutting off another such vehicle. Before the engine dies, she is doing a power slide over the hood. The side door slides open, as four children dressed as ninjas come rolling out. They all sprint into the store, scattering shoppers as they burst in.

     Getting children ready for school is stressful enough. They want the most current and fashionable apparel and supplies. I didn't know you had stick glue with different colored caps. God help you if you don't get the right color. We shouldn't be nasty parents in the process. Our children are watching us. Lets help each other out. They are learning from us. Remember, Santa is always watching. He knows, if you are good or bad.

A Slow Rock to Nowhere

      I write a lot about the past. I think sometimes we rely too much on technology and have lost the personal touch with people. You dont see neighbors visiting each other much anymore. You cant sip iced tea on the porch online. Well maybe you can now, if your wireless network reaches that far. But, it isnt as much fun. You dont get to see your friends expression when you start telling wild stories about his youth to his current love interest.
     However, I do realize I cant live in the old days. We must constantly move forward or shrivel up and blow away. I have seen it throughout my life. My mind pays more attention to it, since I am growing older. People who seem to keep active are the ones that survive into their late 80s and 90s. Im not talking about the fitness freaks that jog 14 miles a day that eat only organic seaweed. The individuals I talk about are those that find an activity that keeps their minds and bodies active.
     Watching Wheel of Fortune and Jeopardy are not the kind of activities I allude to. Neither is spending most of the day watching life float past your front porch. There is little stimulation there. A person must work their mind, body, and soul to survive beyond retirement. Personally, I want to be embarrassing my children and grandchildren into my eighties. Grandpa with his motorcycle, what fun?
     Most of the people I have seen survive, to late in life, spend time doing things. They are always visiting friends, volunteering to help others, or farming. They dont live thinking of the past and that life is over. They find new and exciting things to challenge them. I have even seen many of the, Elderly, on the social media. These people accept the changes and use them to their advantages. There are even dating sites for people over sixty. I havent been brave enough to see what interest they list. I might be traumatized.
    There is a lot that can be learned from people that stay young. Communities can learn from them as well. There are too many towns and cities dying off. These places are stuck in the glory of their past. All they know is what use to be. I have seen so many of the small towns, from the area where I grew up, slowly sliding into oblivion. The coal industry is a shadow of what it once was. It has been replaced by cleaner fuels. The jobs are gone. So are the younger people that were the work force.
     This shouldnt happen. There are some beautiful areas in those mountains. Many of the towns could revamp and find new life. Like the people that excel later in life, they need to embrace the future. I believe the mountains of Southwestern Virginia could be a tourist hotspot for the younger generations looking for fun, excitement, adventure, and relaxation. Im not talking a "Deliverance" weekend. However, I am sure they can hear some good banjo music while traveling through the area.
     There is plenty of beautiful forest and mountains for hiking and camping. There are arts and crafts that were passed down through the generations. No, not just shine recipes. There is nothing like the home cooking to put some weight on those skinny hikers from the suburbs, out trying to get back to nature. There is no denying our culture and music is unique. People would be lined up to spend their money to experience life in the mountains.
     Unfortunately, the communities are like the old man sitting on the porch. He loves to sit and watch the world as it passes by. Stop and talk to him. Hell gladly tell you about how good things use to be. Hell tell you how life is so bad now. Theres nothing as good as it use to be. You better listen close. The old man wont talk to you too long. He has to get back inside and watch his shows. It helps him forget what was and those that have left him behind.

Thanks for the Invitation

      Facebook is an excellent source of material for me to write about. I know I will anger several people with what I am writing. I expect the hate email to pile up after I post this. People do get rather upset when you point out problems with new ways of life. All I have to say about that is, "Bring it on!" I have a delete button, and I am not afraid to use it.
     Don't get me wrong. I'm not against the social media. I have an account myself. It is wonderful. I have been able to get in contact with old friends from high school, college and the military. There were a few of us that thought each other had been killed or died of some exotic poison in the past 20 years or better. This would have been impossible 10 years ago. Today, even 90 year old grandparents keep in touch with their families through Facebook.
     Instead, I refer to those people that tell us everything they do online. Personally, I don't want to hear about you going to the grocery store for the third time, because your spouse got the wrong type of toilet paper. I definitely do not want to hear about your bowel movements. I know there are people that like to share all aspects of their lives. I do caution you to not share as much as some of you do. It gets annoying, and there could be repercussions to over sharing.
    You might ask, "How is that, Matt?"
     I am no criminal, although I have been told I think like one at times. I have seen posts like this before: "Just dropped the dog off at GMs. We are headed on vacation for the next 2 weeks. We cant wait to get to Cancun." Its great to see pictures of peoples vacations in nice exotic locales. However, you may want to wait until you get back. Not all 596 people on your friends list are as reputable as you might think.
     I know some of you have that bellyache face try to understand what I am talking about. Let me break it down for you. First, too many of you have put personal information on the site. How many people are able to see exactly where you live? I can google your house and get directions straight to it, maybe even a picture. Then, I just program it into my GPS and who is knocking at the door.
     Think about that and look at the post, "Just dropped the dog off at GMs." I'm sure your Grandmother will be happy for the company. Unfortunately, the not so honest see something else in that message. "There wont be a dog there to bite me in the butt when I climb through the window."
     "We are headed on vacation for the next 2 weeks." This means several things. The culprits have time to case the house. They also have several days to get the stuff out. It may take a few trips to get out the big screen televisions and your families 100 year old silverware. I wouldn't care if they got my week old plastic ware.
     The last comment says even more. "We cant wait to get to Cancun"Not many people can afford to go there, let alone for two weeks. This says, We have some money and good stuff. The thieves will not be expecting to get cheap stuff from discount stores. Additional, it is very unlikely that you will be coming home unexpectedly. You aren't just around the corner at your sister Martha's house. Their minds are at ease.
     Don't stop sharing those special moments and embarrassing stories. Those are the things that make us smile. Its wonderful to see pictures of loved ones and friends. I just ask you not to share every detail about your life. There are people out there looking for those little tidbits of information. Think before you post. You don't want a good time to turn into a bad day.

Out of the Gene Pool !

      I am amazed at many of the things that make the news these days. There are so many important events going on in the world that some of the things I have read about amaze me. I cannot believe they made it into print. Sometimes it is hard for me to have sympathy for someone that has decided to do one of the, "less intelligent," things in life. I think of many of the old redneck friends I had growing up. There were many stupid ideas we had. The phrase "It seemed like a good idea at the time," always was muttered after someone was hurt. I wonder how many other people have used that phrase.
     You think I might be exaggerating. All you have to do is subscribe to 'News of the Weird.' This is filled with the weird and ridiculous that has been reported on throughout the world. You have everything from the worlds dumbest criminals to politicians who should have never been elected. Some of these individuals are poster children for birth control, or even forced sterilization. I have cringed and shook my head on more than one occasion after reading an article.
     There have been several examples of the "Good Idea Fairy" at work. If you don't know what that is, you are lucky. It is that little invisible fairy that floats around a room whispering ideas quietly in one's ear. She usually has an over abundance of ideas. Many of them have no relevance to the subject or task at hand. Hopefully, there is always someone there with common sense to swat her down.
     Here are a few examples of people that should have never listened to the good idea fairy, or their redneck friends. A woman in Texas recently burned down her own home trying to kill a snake in the yard. She poured gasoline on the snake and had her son toss a lit match upon it. Surprisingly, the snake took off. It's flaming body set brush, and her house on fire. I might not be a fan of snakes, but that would not be my first choice to kill it. A hoe, shovel, or rake would have been an easier choice. Don't say you wouldn't get that close. She had to be right on top of it to pour gas on it.
     There was an article today about a woman from Australia being gored while running with the bulls in Pamplona. That definitely registers as a 'Bubba' moment. I can't say I haven't done my share of stupid things. No person in their right mind crawls through a minefield for fun. But, I have never had a desire to sprint down narrow streets ahead of angry bulls. It isn't like there are people gored or trampled each year doing this. I am sure she had a friend standing there with her going, "It seemed like a good idea." There is always one of those people around.

     I don't believe the media breeds bad ideas. I'm certain that the human race is able to come up with those on their own. The 'bat bombs' of WWII were a prime example. There are times I wonder. Does printed or showing these stories encourage those already prone to commit random acts of insanity? Should we stop printing them? I think Darwin was right. There are no more predators for us to worry about. This could be how the 'gene pool' gets cleaned out these days.

A Father to Remember.

   

       An old friend of mine posted a video on Facebook earlier. It almost made me cry. I was really choked up watching it. The man in that video is an example I hope to emulate as a father. Don't get me wrong. There are many parents out there that are giving everything they have to feed and cloth their families. I have no desire to belittle the sacrifices that they make everyday for their families. They are heroes as well. Unfortunately, it is hard to place their daily devotion on a four minute video.
     I consider myself a a descent father and a man that is is good shape for a 45 year old man. This man puts me to shame. I don't know his age. It doesn't matter. What he accomplished is impressive at any age. Apparently, his son wanted the two of them to compete in an Ironman competition together. Simply competing as a Father and Son is impressive enough. There are many healthy young men and women that never complete the race. It involves a marathon run, a swim designed for sharks, and a bike ride from Hell. Doing all that with a paralyzed child is phenomenal.
     I don't know the man's name. It doesn't matter. His actions are more important than his name. To be  able to even try and compete in the Ironman, took dedication. The father had to spend endless hours training with his child. Even if he had trained on his own, it would not have prepared him for the reality of the competition with his son involved. The video showed him towing his son in a rubber raft through the 2.5 mile swim. I have never swam that far in my life. I cannot even imagine trying that, especially with me trying to pull a raft behind.
     Straight from the water, the father picked up his son and ran several hundred yards to begin a grueling bike race. Not only did the man pick up his son. He cradled him in his arms as he sprinted to the bike. The love was apparent there. His son smiled as he was strapped into a special seat on the front of the bike. His dad went the extra step here. He placed his son in the front, not the back. I'm sure it gave the boy more of the feeling of being involved. He wasn't simply along for the ride.
     Without a chance for pause, the team went straight from the bike race to the 26.2 marathon. The pride and happiness shown on the child's face. The father's visage was beaming pain and determination as he strapped his son in the chair. There were times when he was almost walking pushing the special chair up hills. Other times, he was almost sprinted toward the goal. His son smiled encouragement to him.
     It was well after dark before they crossed the finish line. Hundreds of people stood encouraging them on. tears of joy ran down both their faces as they crossed the line. The father hugged and kissed his inspiration. A smiled crossed the younger man's face. The smile spoke volumes. "See Dad, I knew you could do it. Thank you for helping me do it. You are my Hero, Dad."
     If that doesn't touch your heart, I don't know what will. The Grinch would melt seeing that. This man didn't save the lives of hundreds. He didn't fight some war for God and country. However, he did more. He gave a chance to smile, and a memory that he will never forget. May we all give our children such pleasant memories to remember us by.

Dial 911?

     I have just finished my two weeks Annual training for the National Guard. I know that 25 years is a long time. Many things change in that period of time. I didn't expect the military to change as much as it has. Most of that change has occurred in the last ten years. Before you start speculating, this has nothing to do with the military openly accepting gay soldiers. That doesn't bother me. I have known that they were a part of our armed forces since, I was a wee young soldier. It never bothered me. This is more about the difference in the soldiers from the time of the Cold War to now.
     I noticed an interesting fact while I was sitting in the Chow Hall, sipping on my coffee. It is a morning ritual that most of us old dinosaurs share. While enjoying the extremely bitter brew that this Mess had concocted, I began to really look at the young soldiers around me. When I was a young pup every soldier carried a knife. For many, it was as simple as a pocket knife. In my day, almost every young boy had been given a pocket knife by the time they were 12 years old. It was a rite of passage most boys that lived in the country. This showed that your parents trusted you not cut off anything important; and that you were coming into adulthood. Today, I guess it would be a playstaion, xbox, or their first laptop.
     Every soldier I knew carried a pocket knife, or even better, a Buck knife on his belt. There was always a need for a knife to cut things in those days, or for self defense. The knives seemed to get bigger and bigger as manufactures produced larger folding blades. The knives became so large, that the military felt a need to limit the size and length of them. I believe the maximum length was a 6 inch blade. This stopped some of the soldiers that were trying to make-up for other inadequacies by carrying small swords.
     Those were quickly replaced by the Leathermen and Gerbers. Having a pliers, a screwdriver, and wire cutters beat having a big blade in most circumstances. I know there a few nasty places that I could still be trapped in, if it weren't for these wonderful tools. The leather knife holsters were quickly replaced with these cloth cases. They became so common that the Army started issuing them to certain types of soldiers. There aren't many combat soldiers, I know, that don't still carry one.
     Unlike the troops that have returned from multiple deployments, the new soldiers are very different. I ave had those "Computer Geeks" in my platoon before. You know those kids. They can make a computer do anything, except make a decent cup of coffee. Today's younger soldiers all seem to be of that caliber, at least they think they are. The days of 'Chest Thumping Neandethals' is coming to a close. I seldom hear soldiers bragging about how much they can bench press anymore. Too many prefer to relate to their powers as an operative on "Ghost Assassin," or something in that genre.
     Everyone of them has a laptop, cell phone, and God knows what other gadgets. Now, when you turn the lights out in a barracks, you have to tell them to quit texting. I'm not kidding. The dings and whistles can drive you nuts in the dark. I think I threatened to end the lives of some of these devices, and their owners recently. These are the same soldiers that replaced the knife and gerber on their belts with a cell phone carrier.
 I pointed out this fact to one of my fellow relics. We sat there sipping coffee counting the number of phone holsters we saw pass our table. I think we quit somewhere around 40 or 50. My fellow Non-Commissioned Officer shook his head in dismay. "What are they going to do if they get in trouble?" he asked me.
     I shook my head. I had no answer for him. He answered for me. "We at least carry something that we can cut our way out something not too bad. Or, we can fix a minor problem. What are they gonna' do? Call AAA or 911?"
     I know he was dead serious. He shouldn't have said it while I was taking a drink. I almost choked. He was right. I could see one of them trying to use their cell phone to call for help when things went bad. The rockets coming in and some kid online with 911. I can hear the operator now. "This is 911. What is your emergency?" BOOM!

Burning It Up

       It is definitely Summer time. The days are getting longer. The temperature is rising daily. Children are out of school. Their squeals of delight can be heard throughout the neighbourhoods, along with their grumbles and complaints. I made mine turn of the television and video games this morning and tossed them outside. They are fine. I am sitting at my portable army table. My time is spent alternating between writing, blowing bubbles for the 2 year old, and getting on the older 2 for fighting. Life is good.

     If you are still skeptical that Summer has come, you just need to look at the other signs of the season in modern America. The first thing I noticed were the pools. Those quick assemble, or inflatable models seem to be in a quarter of the back yards these days. My wife and I spent Memorial Day Weekend getting ours ready like everyone else. How do I know all those people were doing the same thing? My wife told me so.... She said the aisle for pool products and parts was packed at the local Walmart. I even saw a picture on Face Book where a friend had used duct tape to fix a leak instead of heading back there.
     The smell of the grills firing up is the next giveaway. There is nothing like the smell of fresh food prepared over an open flame. I prefer the charring of good chunk of meat. Even vegetables taste better roasted over an open flame. I think this has something to do with our caveman days. "Me hunt. Me Kill. Me eat." It is pretty simple. Only one thing has improved cooking over a fire. That is the addition of beer. Even if you overcook the food, enough beer will make it edible.
    Whatever you do, don't make one of my mistakes. A cold beer is great while you grill. It relaxes you and loosens you up to try new recipes and ideas. You need to make sure you are not too loose. Please limit that intake. I didn't, just after I got my gas grill. I wasn't paying attention to the food. My time was spent having beers with my family and friends. I wasn't paying attention to the food. I learned how quickly lamb drips grease and starts a fire.The house almost went up in flames. Plus, we had to have burnt hockey pucks for dinner. Needless to say, I was far from the hero of that day. Thank God there was plenty of beer.
     The final sign would have to be the clothing. The outfits seem to get smaller, brighter, and tighter. As I get older, I realize that there aren't that many people that should be wearing these outfits. They were designed for those models and stars you see in the media. The majority of us should never be seen in a belly shirt or skimpy shorts. There are too many people that need to be told not to wear certain outfits. I am glad I have my wife. She has stopped me from causing major accidents with my shorts. No, they aren't skin tight. But, the glare of my pasty white legs could signal low flying aircraft. Imagine what they could do to a normal person without sunglasses.
     It is definitely Summer time. Go out and have fun with your family and friends. Remember to be safe. Drink responsibly. The phrase, "Bubba, that sounds like a good idea," should never be heard when a drink is being had. Wear your sunscreen and sunglasses. You never know. I could walk around the corner wearing my shorts.

That's The Way It Is......

     I read the news online everyday. I do this for several reasons. First, I do not like the American news system. It is too sensationalized. Do you think I really care which teen star has been arrested for drugs and drinking this week? My answer is NO! There are much more important things in the world than knowing the intimate details of someones love life. If we are lucky, that person will be a has-been in a few short years. I prefer to read the news that comes from the international press. It gives me an unglamourous view of world events. There are times I have watched the news and expect a cabaret show to start. I am sure that there are times that the producers have toyed with the idea of adding magicians and strippers to do the news. I can see the weatherman now, "Hey Rocky, you wanna see me pull a forecast outta my hat?" Okay, I stole that from Bullwinkle. That doesn't matter, I feel that dense after watching some news reports. You can tell they are simply reading a script. Ill bet they couldn't tell you what it was that had been read. There are some of them I doubt know the difference between Kosovo and Costa Rica.
     More and more of the Anchor People remind me of entertainers. The studios have added buff tanned men to the position. They have a practiced smile that says Used Car Salesman to me. How can I trust someone to tell me the truth that gives me the creeps? The female anchors are no better. They become younger and more curvaceous each year. They are dressed to tease and encourage adolescent males to watch the shows. I'm sure the men are paying a lot of attention to what is really being said. How long before the burlesque shows start? Hold it! I think some networks are already there.
     What happened to the days when you had that stately old gentleman, or tough grand dam? I would rather watch my news from someone that had lived enough life to know about the news. They reported the facts about news worthy events. I want to know why we might be going to war, not what the best dressed couple is wearing to the local gala. Give me one of those tough individuals that literally came up through the trenches. Id prefer someone that knew who Vladimir Putin, over knowing who Justin Bieber is. Where are Barbara Walters and Walter Cronkite when you need them?

     O! I did say there was a second reason. That one is simple. It is children. Any parent can tell you that it is impossible to watch any news when the children are around. I have yet to sit down watch it without a fight, emergency, or an impromptu concert occurring with them. There are times I think that my little darlings have battle plans drawn up to distract me whenever I try to catch up on daily events. Plan A1A I am certain is have one of them go into the other room and scream like they are hurt. Dad goes sprinting in to check out the boo-boo. By the time I calm the child and return to my seat, there are the other two watching another cartoon. You weren't watching anything, were you Dad? is always the response when I return.
     Like I said before, it is easier and better for me to read my news online. There is far less drama and acting going on. Once the children and the newscasters mature, I will start watching the network news again. I'm betting on my children to get there first.

                                  

To Be, Or Not

     It amazes me how much some people seek to be famous and rich. I know that is backwards from the way it is normally said. However, I believe that people want to be famous more than anything. They want everyone to recognize them wherever they go. Rich was placed second. This is due to the fact that many of the people that become famous blow their money. These people are continuously trying to be what they think people want. Ergo, they may stay famous but not rich. This mentality has given rise to the Reality TV craze. Don't deny it. We feed into their vanity. You have watched some form of reality television. We all have at some point in the last few years. It seems that this is the main focus for the networks these days. Don't shake your head and say No, I haven't. I will say you are a liar. There is almost no way to watch television, without seeing at least one of these shows. Gone are the wonderful comedies of my youth. The price on production for one of these must far cheaper than paying for actors and studio time. There are enough individuals that will act like fools for the notoriety they gain.

     One of my old professors once equated the television to the gladiatorial games of ancient Rome. The games were used placate and pacify the masses of Roman citizens that had become unruly, during certain periods of the different emperors. The games had to morph into grand elaborate affairs to keep the interest of the common citizen. Each had to be bigger and better than the last one. Otherwise, riots were likely to occur. What would happen if the satellite and cable went out for a month in this country? Would people survive on books and news papers, or would hysteria reign. I can see where he compared the games to the "Boob Tube." If you think that that name come from all the well endowed women on it, you are way too young. Ask someone that had to turn a dial instead of use a remote.

     Think about it. The majority of Americans would prefer to sit at home watching other people experience life. We buy television sets that are as large as the wall they are mounted on. Our neighbors could watch the programs we are watching, from their windows across the street. All this allows the watcher to see it unfold in life-sized high definition, while listening in surround sound. A show just cant be enjoyed properly without all that. Can it?
     There isn't a viewer out there that cant survive without this technology to watch their favorite reality star. God knows it would lower the experience watching your favorite male, or female, on a normal television. You wouldn't be able to see them flex or bounce properly across the screen. The gratuitous skin shots of the artificially enhanced individuals can be topped only by one thing. That is their unnatural ability to prove their breast, or pectoral size exceeds their IQ. Okay, some of them it is their guts or beards that are larger. I cant discriminate against the less pretty reality stars.
     To be fair not all of them are dense individuals, willing to debase themselves for their moment in the sun. Some of the people are smart about it. They take the money and fame and use it to their advantages; building businesses and a future for their families. This does not include those beautiful people that used it for a springboard for their adult entertainment endeavors. That is something that a person should have been able to accomplish without doing prime time. Sorry, that is another form of mindless visual stimulant. I am getting my mind out of the gutter now.
     My professor might have been right about a majority of television shows. However, the television has brought us many wonderful moments. Who can say that they didn't love Lucille Ball? Did you not weep watching a wife and child crying over the flag draped casket of an American soldier? It all isn't bad. We have the ability to see wondrous moments, as they happen. World events are at our finger tips. These are things that were not available that long ago. As people, we just have to be smarter than the networks and the television. Use the OFF button and try to live life. Or, you can star in your own reality show.

"He Sat and Wept"

    I have been told that, "If you don't change your ways, you're going to hell." Comments like that never affected me as a young man, I was certain I was immortal. I preferred the one preacher who told me, "son, you are on a highway to Hell. But, I lay odds you will be the first selling lemonade there." I was thinking the beer tent was more my style.
     Some religious leaders are quick to condemn you, if your beliefs are different. This has lead to more strife and death than any other reason in history. Even today, people hurt each other in the name of religion. The major religions seem to be the worst offenders. Christians, Muslims, and Jews are all locked together in a cycle filled with hate and distrust. Sure there are historic reasons that support the fear and distrust. The Crusades and The Spanish Inquisition are things that are ingrained in the psyche of the people.
     I do not claim to be a follower of any of these faiths. I have read the holy books of each. It is interesting that they all worship the same God. Many of their ideas and beliefs are intermingled. All three paths begin at the same doorstep. Slowly the paths diverge and twist along separate routes, only to return to the same home in the end. It is like three young men going out to make their fortunes in life. One chooses the life of a soldier, the other a career as a lawyer, and the third becomes teacher. All have different lives, but eventually return home in the end.
     I know this is an over simplification of religion. But, I believe in the KISS method. That stands for "Keep It Simple Stupid." We have complicated so much in life. Why should we make things more difficult? There is no need for me to hate a man because he seeks a different path to enlightenment than I do. I prefer to hate that person because they are a jerk, or just plain mean. That is why I cant understand the hatred of someone I never met. To me, it is the same as hating Billy Bob because he wore a red shirt when the rest of us wore a blue one. "How dare he be different?"
     My military career has taken me all around the world. I have worked with people of all these different beliefs. They have stood across the field from me at other times. Despite this, I never hated one of them because of how he believed in God. So what if he worshipped a tree and I whispered to the wind, it doesnt change the type of people we are on the inside.  

     I wonder what God thinks sitting there watching this mess. Does he weep at the idiocy of it all, brother destroying brother in his name? Maybe he laughs because we have jacked it all up. We have twisted things so badly that none of us have a chance at going to heaven. If that is the case, remember me. Ill be the bald guy trying to set up a beer tent. Someone else bring the ice. 

  

A Little Goes a Long Way

     Happiness. That is a huge word. It has so many different meanings to a wide variety of people. I have read about the Buddhist versions, metaphysical perspectives, and modern-day views. They all have different idea's on what makes a person happy. Guess what? I have my own take on it.
   Today I see so many people that the word has nothing but monetary and selfish meaning to the word. People seem to not be happy unless they have the biggest and best toys. One neighbor must have everything that the guy across the street has. I believe that some people are so bad that I believe they would go to ridiculous lengths to satisfy their superior ‘happiness.’ This can be seen in the vehicles we have on our roads today. The Hummer is the best example. Even a civilian version of the vehicle is not a luxury vehicle. It is an oversized, gas guzzling, show piece. It says, “I have more money than sense.” Especially, when I see them with pimp paint job and gold spinning hubcaps.
    I am for a more simple definition of happiness. When I was a child, it meant that I had the necessities in life. There was always food in my belly. It may not have been the food I wanted. Liver and onions are still a bane for me to this day. There was always a warm bed. Sometimes, that meant I had to share it with my brother. If you are old enough to remember heating your home with coal or wood, you will understand. There was many a night I can remember sharing a bred with my brother to conserve heat. I may have been sore from the elbows and knees. However, we were warm and cozy with half the blankets in the house piled on us.
    There was also plenty of love to make us happy. I was not always certain that it was love. Mom was a tough lady. She could reach out and touch you with a belt or any thing she had handy, when you were breaking the rules. Her house shoes were the worst. Those rubber things hurt like crazy. My brother and I took turns hiding them, preferably at the bottom of the trash can. I never understood she loved us so much until I became a parent. You have to punish your children to make them better people and to teach them to respect rules. I just Mom had not loved quite so much, or so hard.
    When I became a young man happiness was defined differently for me. It was less the comfort of life, but more the pleasures of life. The first thing you are thinking is X-rated I am sure. Shame on you! I was going to say a good book, a cold beer, and a good smoke. Sometimes it is better to talk about the smaller things that mean a great deal to us, than those larger aspects of our lives.
    My books have given me great pleasure and comfort at times when there was nothing else to give me escape when I needed it. The places and events were light years from the pain and fear that were part of my life at times. I can remember a time when I, and my fellow soldiers, relied on books for our only form of entertainment. We would cut a book into separate chapters and pass them around. I know there are a lot of book lovers that cringe at that idea. However, that is the only way we all could enjoy the few we had.
    Anyone that has enjoyed a cold beer on a hot day, after working hard, can understand why I included it. There were times when I tried to brew my own. This was when I was serving in countries where alcohol was not allowed. There were other times when I sat sipping some of the finest brew in the world, watching the world walk by. Like many others, I even used to drown out the darkness that I had known in life. That never worked. All I got was the ‘Mother of All Hangovers,’ and stories I can never tell my children.
    I know it is not politically correct to say that smoking has given me comfort. But, it has. You finish a mission where you are not certain where you will live or die, that cigarette will seem real nice too you. I have seen men who have never smoked before, beg a smoke after surviving a nasty situation. I also had some of my best conversations while sharing a cigar under a dark night sky. Some of those conversations included a nice shot of scotch, and were debates over books. Ha, you can have all three at once.
    Now, I find happiness in small things. My family is the main thing. I am not saying they are small. I am saying it is the little things that are so important. Everyone seems so busy these days, most forget to stop and enjoy what they have. My wife and children give me moments that I draw on when times are tough. These small moments make me a wealthy and happy man.
    All parents know that wonderful quiet time when the children are all in bed and you have a few moments alone. There is seldom silence or time to relax in house full of children. You usually want to go to bed after they do, or finish some chore you couldn’t while they are awake because they wanted to help. When the moon shines right and the stars are aligned both parents can sit down and relax together. It is one of the few times that my wife and I can sit on the couch together and watch shows that do not involve muppets, puppets, or cartoons. When we are lucky we can both stay awake and finish the show.
    I have three very different daughters. My Oldest tells me she is going to be an actress/rock star. She treats me too impromptu concerts and plays regularly. My middle daughter is a tomboy who will a gamer/veterinarian. She loves to have me tell her bedtime stories, choosing the oddest subjects for our tales. My baby girl is too young to choose a career. I would have to say now she is a monkey/princess. She tries to climb everything while wearing her dress and crown. Despite the differences, they are all very loving children. They will all pile on me while we watch television. I call it the ‘puppy pile.’ It is warm and cozy, except for the elbow in the ribs and the knee in the groin. Yet, there is nothing better.
    Happiness is different things to different people at different times. To one person it could be a mansion on the hill. To another individual it is the salad from the vegetables they grew themselves. We can not be happy all the time. However, we can be most of the time. A person just needs to find those things that are truly important and focus on them. Everything else is background noise.

Sometimes I Feel Like a Nut.....

         I posted on my Facebook page today that I sometimes felt like Clint Eastwood in 'Heartbreak Ridge.' At other times, I felt like Danny Kaye in 'A Court Jester.' Many of the 'ancients' understood my references. I even had a friend tell me he felt more like Warren Beatty in 'Deliverance.' That makes me certain that I prefer my life to his, at least for the moment. It just goes to show you, things can always be worse.
     Many of you may be confused, or just not understand my references. There are many of you out there that were born after 8-tracks and cassettes had gone the way of the dinosaurs. I doubt you would recognize the theatrical references that I had made. Not that either of those movies will go down in history as great cinema. They were simply good entertainment that caught my attention and allowed me a few moments escape from normalcy.
     I do not feel like 'Gunny' in the movie because I am as tough and mean as he is. Although, I am certain that there are some soldiers out there that still think I am the Antichrist. You can not be loving and nurturing when training soldiers for combat. These young men and women have to be hard as nails to survive, both the physical and mental challenges they have to face. Gunny Highway fought officers and soldiers alike trying to prepare his men and leadership for the dangers they were to face.
     I can relate to his pain. The military has become a place where the individuals feelings are more important than preparing for the evil ahead. These brave souls are heading into a world that the movies and video games never prepared them for. We, as leaders, do them a great disservice by not preparing them for the horrors to come. Not everyone is meant for combat. It would be better to eliminate them before they see the battlefield. They are a danger to themselves and others.
     I feel like I am the 'Gunny' at the end of the movie. There is nothing more I can do for the young troops. It is time for them to find their paths and 'Lead the Way,' now. My wars have been fought. The knowledge I had has been passed on to that next generation. The time for old 'War Horses' is past. It is my time to sit down, light that stogies, and smile as they succeed.
     When I don't feel like an ancient warrior awaiting the Valkyrie's cry, I feel much like the 'Court Jester' That was a wonderful movie filled with humour and fun. There are moments in that movie that are priceless. Danny standing there showing the exposing the baby's bottom, so that the soldiers may see the royal birthmark, is humour at its best. It seems to be such a 'Parent' moment.There was embarrassment and pride both in his characters face.
     I have three little girls. I have gotten past the embarrassed stage. I have had children trow up all over me, run naked through the house at the most odd times, found food and other presents left for me well past the expiration date. I could rant and rave or laugh and enjoy their childish antics. I would love to say I laugh all the time. Unfortunately, sometimes I forget they are children and get upset.
     There are times and events I will never forget, or stop smiling about. There is the pink boa that the girls used as hair, so they could do my hair. The night spent cramped up in a tent designed for 2 little girls, not 2 girls and a Dad. My baby running through the house in her pink dress with her banana screaming "I'm a Princess. I'm a Princess" will melt any heart. I guess I am the jester, showing the princesses off to the world.
     Too bad there is no evil night for me to slay.Then again, I have been lead around the house to beat up the 'monsters' that were hiding in the dark places. All I need are the tights and a funny hat with a feather. I had better be quiet. I am sure the girls would find me some, if they thought they could get me in them...... Who am I kidding? All they would have to do is ask.

Lost Time

          Time is a Fickled mistress. None of us may escape her attentions. It is what we choose to do with her affections that matters. The majority of people fall into three categories, that I have noticed. The first group are the 'Kickers and Screamers.' these are the people who refuse to accept the fact that they are no longer in their twenties, and have not been for at least two decades. I know you know at least one of these people. There is that mother that raids her teenage daughter's closet. She tries to squeeze into an outfit that would not have fit her in her prime. Mom also tries to stay hip by learning, and using the latest trends and slang. Men aren't any better. They get hair implants, buy a new sports car, and squeeze into jeans two sizes too small. Then, they try and date girls that are closer to their children's ages than their own. This would not be so bad if they chose intelligent women they could commune with. However, they do not. The chose tends to swing closer to the erotic dancer type. Women who have more implants than a cyborg and who could care less about conversation than material things.
      Group two I will call the 'Rockers.' These are not people that keep playing 'Rock Music,' into their senior years. These are the people that give up on life after they retire. There seems to be nothing left for them to enjoy. I have seen too many of these people. They feel that they have outlived their usefulness. The only thing they have left is waiting on 'Jeopardy' to come on each night. Or, they prefer to sit on the front porch watching the world and time pass them by. They slowly count the passing of time with each rock of the rocking chair. All they have is the moment and the past.

     The final major group is the one I fall into when I reach that point. These are the people that find something to do to be productive well into their eighties, or longer. These people try to maintain a fun active life up until their final days. This is the group I want to belong to. My Grandfather and Father were members of this club as well. There is a part of me that wants to write and ride motorcycles, until I am in my eighties. By then, I may be on a trike with a rack for my walker. Life will be so enjoyable being that embarrassing older member of the family. I will be happy to leave my family with good memories and experiences in life. There can be nothing better than showing your loved ones how to live and love up until the end.